Babies are very basic. They have three thoughts: Gotta get food; gotta get sleep; gotta make room for more food. Interfere with any of these and you had better be wearing earplugs. Parents are slaves to this smelly, noisy, demanding blob who keeps them awake day and night and makes them wonder if it was all worth it.
But whether the new arrival is confronted by parents filled with joy, anger, distress, depression, contentment or suicidal thoughts, the baby is completely oblivious and would, if he or she could, respond by saying, “Excuse me, but you seem to have confused me with someone who gives a shit.” We therefore enter the world in a state of complete selfishness, which is exploited to the full.
This arrangement is not completely one sided, however. After some months of false alarms, the baby will break into a genuine smile instead of a grin inspired by the contortions required to release wind. Or something worse. This original smile is the signal the outside world is waiting for. The baby is now ready to be manipulated and moulded to fit his or her place in life. It is also the time when parents are able to start passing on their insecurities and weird ideas to their offspring. Their motivation is, of course, to help their child grow up to be happy and well-adjusted. The result, of course, is exactly the opposite.
Whaddo I Know? 