Seven Pets to Avoid
1. Dinosaurs: Most of them are too large for the average dwelling and they have terrible trouble distinguishing their owners from lunch. Another, perhaps insurmountable problem, is that they are extinct.
2. Amoebas: Easy storage and maintenance does not make up for the fact that they can’t be seen without high powered optical instruments. And when you can see them, they never seem to do much, anyway.
3. Elephants: Too large and when they sit in front of the fire you can’t see the television. And when walking them, the pooper-scooper never seems enough.
4. Lions: The food bill for these cats is enormous and putting them out for the night can lead to problems with any surviving neighbours. It is also uncomfortable when they curl up on your lap.
5. Hyenas: A good audience for when you tell bad jokes, but rather filthy in the habit department. They prefer a good poke through rotting garbage before they will even look at a doggy bite.
6. Giraffes: Ill suited to home use and will suffer serious neck problems if constantly fetching your slippers. Not to mention the crippling chiropractic bills.
7. Rattlesnakes: May keep the baby happy, but likely to frighten older children and take offence at being stroked. It is also inconvenient when they bite the postman.
Whaddo I Know? 